Wednesday, December 31, 2008

Half-retraction


I believe there is great value in taking a closer look, in not flying off the handle and speaking before you have all the information. Why? Because it pays not to look like an idiot when the facts come out.

I thought I was going to have to eat my words recently. Not too long ago, I wrote a post that included my non-number based theory that America isn't buying trucks and SUVS like they used to. Well, it turns out I only have to eat half my words. As of the beginning of December, pickups were still extremely strong sellers, but SUV sales have slumped dramatically. My anecdotal theory had a hole- people actually still need the utility provided by genuine pickup trucks, so their sales haven't slumped nearly as far as SUVs have. I might submit that part of their continued sales performance is due to the deep discounts that have been offered on them lately, but I understand that there are simply people who need to haul things.

It seems that America has voted, however, that the "U" in "sport utility vehicle" is a misnomer as their sales have plummeted about as quickly as the value of Madoff investments. So, pickup trucks, I apologize- the value of your utility is undeniable as non-essentials are cut and your sales remain strong. I proudly eat my words against you. SUVs, you must have known your time was coming. Perhaps the SUV bubble has popped.

Tuesday, December 30, 2008

Quote of the somethingorother

"I wish my grass was emo so it would cut itself."
- Mike from Virginia

Monday, December 29, 2008

Quote of the somethingorother

"Most cynics are just frustrated optimists."

Wednesday, December 24, 2008

What does sound look like?


It's official, I'm tired of being told to look at things on the radio. Radio is a difficult medium, especially with as visual as humans tend to be. It doesn't help that such a hefty part of advertising is built upon visuals. But I still don't feel that's any excuse to ignore the medium's most obvious feature- the fact that you can't see anything. At least two radio ads I've heard recently have done this.

The first is for the new Blackberry Storm. Naturally, a touchscreen is a tough sell on radio, but I'm forced to grind my teeth when the spot starts out by telling me to look at the screen. It's not that I won't, but I can't, no matter how hard they want me to.

The other is for Guitar Hero World Tour. It starts out with the right idea, asking you to remember the TV spot (still a bit of a cop-out), but quickly degenerates from there. First, it tells me to "look at that," then goes on to tell me, "no, stop looking at..."

Know your medium, don't try to recycle your TV spots. Sometimes it requires a little more imagination or even the occasional straight-sell, but at least you won't be insulting people by telling them to see the sound waves coming out of their speakers.

Tuesday, December 23, 2008

The death of a billboard


I saw a sad sight today. It was a billboard along a major US interstate, bare on both sides. That's right, no message- just empty ribs sticking out into the sky like the skeleton of a woolly mammoth brought to the ground by the spears and ropes of a vicious economy and picked clean by the beaks of close-out sales and store liquidations.

Monday, December 22, 2008

Social media utopia: it runs on dreams and rainbows

Adrian Ho from Adweek suggests that the future of branding is in a system of mini-communications between employees of a company and consumers. He posits that traditional marketing will go the way of the dinosaur and that communications will come from thousands of blogs and twitters that employees at every level will produce to which the public will listen. I think this philosophy is severely flawed on three counts.

The first two places I disagree with Mr. Ho are in regards to his idea about brands embracing the Zappos form of marketing where "mini-communications," if you will, between employees and consumers will form the backbone of future marketing efforts. Here are two reasons I believe this model will always be the exception and not the rule.

One- Executives will NEVER yield that kind of communicative power to the lowly ranks of employees of major companies. Zappos is an exception, and a wonderful one, but if you think for a moment that somewhere like Burger King or Starbucks is going to put the billions of dollars of carefully crafted public image they have created in the hands of their underpaid, overworked, largely disgruntled workforce, you're crazy. They're not going to allow it, much less encourage it. Why? Because most brands cannot, or will not, foster the kind of happiness and loyalty required for the kind of communications above to come out positive, much less consistent.

Two- Mr. Ho's model involves companies keeping employees around long enough to develop long-term relationships with customers. I'm sorry, anyone else here been paying attention to business models lately? Employment at any company is getting shorter and shorter by the year. Why? Companies are doing everything they can to cut benefits and keep wages down to manage costs. Employment is getting shorter and only showing signs of shorterning further as most companies create technicalities where their employees are all "independent contractors" to avoid paying any benefits at all. And I'm supposed to believe the future of brand communications is based on companies extending employment for the purpose of setting their disgruntled employees loose on the public's ear? Please.

My third bone to pick is this- While social media certainly has a place in future communications (especially if anyone starts figuring out how to use it successfully, reliably and cost-effectively), it will not replace all other forms of brand communications. Like TV, print, radio and outdoor, traditional media as an entity will not perish from the earth. They will simply move over and yield market share to new forms as they have throughout history.

More importantly, unless we delve into some sort of "brand heaven" where all employees have long employments at companies they love so much they want to tell the world, Hr. Ho's suggested model will be about as accessible as the fountain of life.

Wednesday, December 10, 2008

WHO dunnit? WHO dunnit.

I'm filing the World Health Organization under "unfortunate acronyms."

"Who says smoking is bad for you?"
"Exactly."
"What?"
"WHO says smoking is bad for you."
"I'm confused."